Hay-on-Wye Festival, 26th May 2008, British people in wet weather

Portly Welsh man, little guy that helped write the book, MES, two "onstage security" one male one female and they said they had never had onstage security before....MES cannot help fucking about with microphones, even if they are tiny microphones such as get used at a literary event...still managed to make them feed back, causing technical sound person come onstage and set them right after he had dicked about with them...repeated Front Row tactic of asking questioner "what do you think?" when stumped for what to say...no great revelations, nothing that wasn't in the book, but made us laugh taking the piss out of the portly Welsh interviewer man. Good humor but 0 great revelations: he writes from 7.30 till midday every day, keeps "a fifth" and covers the rest in vegetables so no one can read it.

7:30 to midday is my peak time for working also

Half three until six is a good after work weekday drink, if your shift allows.

Miserable weather: raining all weekend. Low clouds obscuring the scarp of the nearby Black Mountains.

The festival site: white marquees on green field arranged in a series around open cloisters littered with empty rain washed chairs. Everywhere a gradually encroaching rising water table muddinging the grass and making the faux grass walkways squishy underfoot. A high class refugee camp for Guardian readers.

To the bar: £10.80 for 3 drinks, being able to read is over-rated if this is what literary types are used to paying for their drinks.

Good turnout: all ages and a healthy mix of male and female.

Into the marquee, and as usual the front row is VERBOTEN and reserved for special people who never turn up. So onto row three. Smith already on stage and snickering with cohorts.

The whole event lasts about 45mins. Austin Collings (spell?) looks about 15 years old. Smith as mentioned above continually attempts to wrong foot the interviewer by pissing about with his mic to cause feedback, asking for questions to be repeated.

Most interesting to myself:
It is other people who tell Smith what significance Fallwork holds.
Claims 2 favourite stand out albums are Hex and Shiftwork.
Listens to Dub Reggae and 1950s music. 50s music has the primitive sound he is after.

In the brief Q&A I ask him why he doesn't appear to like the Internet. He says it's alright, but is the Tongue of Satan (rumour mongering, etc.)
Other questions range from the Manchester Scene with regards to Curtis and the Squirrel incident which receives an amusing anecdote from Smith with regards to his being contacted by poachers willing to give evidence on his behalf that no squirrels have been seen in North Manchester since 1972. Smith answers nearly all questions by asking the questioner "what do you think?"

I can never decide whether or not:
A. Smith is a genius and is subverting the interview technique with monosyllabic answers, avoiding questions by pretending not to hear, answering questions with questions, and generally showing the interviewer that it is not they who are in control and he will not play their game, forcing them to think beyond the stereotypical interview scenario.
B. Smith knows why he is there and should do it properly and stop mucking about.

Afterwards a dash across the waterlogged cloister to hot foot it to the book signing. Stand behind Pat from Datblygu and bloke in front perks up at the mention of the band name to remark he lives 10 minutes away from Datblygu frontman David R Edwards, but completely ignores Pat.
Clasped in Pat's hand is an early picture sleeve (it's the real new thing ?) and accusations are made about my copy of Bingo Master's Breakout really being hers that has been mislaid since the mid 1980s.

I profer my copy of the book and receive the obligatory "your pal Mark Smith" on the title page, my brother, Stephan tries the write what you like approach and is rewarded with "to Pete, Mark E Smith".

I did record it and am currently working out how to release it into the wilds of the Internet.

It is a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it, as the saying goes. Myself and Garston Strang were in the company of Pat, but we were not in that queue for signings. Afterwards, she showed us her signed book and "Its The New Thing". On the book he'd put a kiss X after the sig., the old smoothie. I told her as she is currently #1 in Welsh Language Charts (for 2nd week running) then MES should have her autograph.

Slightly off topic, but what is the deal with accomodation and Hay? Do all the B@B's charge zillions or is it like a literary Glastonbury with lots of people camping? Or do people generally drive there for the day?

It was ten quid a night for camping, compared to the £8 I paid in the bar for a pint of cider and a glass of Pimm's. Fuck that!

The campsite was just over the road from the festival, which was a load of marquees in a field, all joined up by this wooden walkway so we didn't get our nice clothes muddy. There weren't that many people camping though, not surprising I guess given the weather. Most of the B&Bs get sold out pretty quick, which is why we ended up camping.

I asked the question, What's next for The Fall? MES said they were playing some gigs in the Soviet Union - Croatia and Estonia. Altfish asked the one about squirrels - a fitting end to the proceedings I thought. Did anyone else grab the mike?

Thanks for the information. I may think about it next year.

BBC Online piece
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/7425019.stm

Guardian snippet (Third paragraph).
http://books.guardian.co.uk/story/0,,2282418,00.html